What's Your Flavour?

So I've just done this test for the second time. And no surprise, I've ended up being Emergent/PostModern. What does surprise me, is that even though I've been involved in more Pentecostal/Charismatic experiences, it still doesn't rate very high on my theological experience table.

I think that the Church needs all types of Spirituality. I really believe that. So whilst this Emergent/Postmodern attitude states that "You feel alienated from older forms of church, you don't think they connect to modern culture very well", I don't entirely agree with that. I do feel alienated from many forms of Church, but that's not necessarily just the older forms. Actually, if I had my choice of going to a High Anglican church or a Pentecostal Charismatic church, I would choose the High Anglican church any day of the week, and twice on Sundays. I think in our desire to be "more modern, more trendy", we've actually lost a lot of the sacred traditions which ground us.

I actually think that a lot of the more modern churches have "missed the mark" in relation to what the modern culture needs or wants. Take my tradition for example - The Salvation Army has lost many of the traditions which have made us who we are today. Over the Red Shield weekend, I was given the opportunity to chat with many older people for whom The Salvation Army was incredibly significant. One couple recounted the days when they would follow The Salvation Army's band and timbrels through the streets of Richmond, back to the church, and end with a "pie floater" together in community. They told me they miss hearing the band, and questioned whether the timbrels still exist. I told them that they do, not in a lot of corps, but in a few around the traps. Their comment "That's a shame, it's the most distinctive thing about the Army, it's what we loved about them". But people tell me all the time, "oh but it's not relevant anymore!"... isn't it? Really? Why then is the first question any of my not-yet-christian friends ask me "Wow, the Salvos, do you wear a uniform? Do you play in the band? Do you play the tamborine?" when I tell them that yes I wear uniform, my dad plays in the band and I do play the Timbrel - they don't tease me - THEY LOVE IT! They ask more questions, they want to know more. Still in this day and age, people connect with us on that level. So why do we run from it? Why don't we do Open Air meetings anymore? Because some other tradition told us it was no longer relevant?

I guess what makes me "emergent/postmodern" is that I truly believe that being in relationship with people - from all walks of life - from all faith traditions is not something to shy away from, but something to embrace and use to enrich our own faith experience. It is through our relationships and our dialogue with people that we can truly connect with Christ in the now, in the today, in the moment.

Perhaps the most "Emergent" idea I have - is that if The Salvation Army is to truly walk in it's calling and anointing from God... it needs to go back and look at what we did really well pre-1980's, and try and regain some of that, yes in a modern setting, but to get back and do it!! It's time! I'm over trying to be like the other churches, we're not a church, we're a movement... so let's move!

So what's your flavour? What is your theological perspective? But more importantly - how can you use that to enrich The Salvation Army or your local church?

What's your theological worldview? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Emergent/Postmodern You are Emergent/Postmodern in your theology. You feel alienated from older forms of church, you don't think they connect to modern culture very well. No one knows the whole truth about God, and we have much to learn from each other, and so learning takes place in dialogue. Evangelism should take place in relationships rather than through crusades and altar-calls. People are interested in spirituality and want to ask questions, so the church should help them to do this. Emergent/Postmodern 75% Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan 71% Neo orthodox 64% Modern Liberal 54% Classical Liberal 43% Roman Catholic 36% Charismatic/Pentecostal 32% Reformed Evangelical 29% Fundamentalist 25%

When I'm Old & Gray...

Over the past week, I've really stopped to think about how blessed we are to have older people in our lives. I've always really valued the older generation - my grandparents generation, for what they have to offer us, and for the service they have provided for many many years.

On Monday, I attended two funerals. The first was for a friend's grandfather. His name was Peter, and he was such an amazing God-fearing man. Peter attended our Community Dinners each month, and to be honest, although he was old, you would never have known it for his energy and passion he brought with him. Peter was not only an amazing God-fearing man, he was also a wonderful husband, father and grandfather. In a world where "real men" are hard to find, Peter modeled what a "real man" should be. I am better for knowing him. He will be greatly missed.

The other funeral was for a wonderful woman, Nan, from my parent's Corps - South Barwon. Nan was a faithful servant of God, and though she had lived a hard childhood, later in life, she became a humble servant at The Salvation Army South Barwon. Nan was one of the first people I spoke to at South Barwon, and always greeted me with a smile, and would hold my hands in hers as she spoke to me. She will be so greatly missed not just by me, but also by my mum and the Corps.

This week, I also got some pretty bad news about my grandfather. He's really not well at the moment. I've always been a bit of a Grandpa's girl, and was the only grandchild to ever work for him in his fruitshop. Our times together at the shop were not always fun, but they always started and ended with a kiss and a cuddle from Grandpa. That's the stuff I remember. Grandpa's really not well at the moment, and he probably will not be able to be operated on. It's so sad to see him this way. He's in a lot of pain, and the reality of "old age" has hit him physically - unfortunately for him, he's still young in his mind, so it frustrates him no end. On Wednesday, my sister, niece & I went to spend some time with Grandpa & Grandma, and boy did we have fun. I love hearing Grandpa's old stories. He told one in particular about my great-Grandfather which deserves a blog all of it's own.... so that's a to be continued... Suffice to say, I'm blessed to come from such a rich heritage of Salvationists & Salvation Army Officers, and that heritage has not only shaped who I am today, but also the type of Officer I hope to be.

So - what are we to do with our heritage? Will we continue it or will we change it for future generations? When I'm older, what stories will I tell my grandkids? What will I leave them that they'll tell their kids? I pray, that as I get older, I will draw on the experiences of those who have gone before me. I pray that I grow stronger in my faith, that I grow deeper in my love for God and for people. I'm going to lean on the promise of God that:



“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” Isaiah 46:4

How about this week, you take the time to listen to a story from someone of the older generation? Let's start to draw on their experiences, and use them to help us grow.

To My Anon Friend...

I'd like to take a moment to thank the person, (I assume is the very same "Anon" who posted on my "Faith or Fear" blog), who sent me a package to work today warning me against the Jesus Christians.

I have read the information you both gave me and the website you posted, and I do appreciate your feedback and input. I would have preferred if you actually told me who you were, but I understand that perhaps you've had bad dealings with people in the past so probably don't want me to know who you are. If it is that you are a friend of mine and are concerned with how I would react if I knew it was you sending me this information, please know, I would have taken your guidance with much grace, love and appreciation.

I need to state that at no point am I promoting the Jesus Christians - I do not feel they are a movement people should necessarily get involved in - and they are certainly not a movement I'd care to get involved in. The point of the blog was not that we should all go out and join the Jesus Christians. For one thing, I don't actually like that they are not attached to a church - I believe that the only way to "fix" the Churches problems is from the inside, not the outside. I also do not support their donation of one of their kidneys to people on the waiting list as a way of true membership, or whatever their take on it is. My kidney will stay very much in place, unless one of two things happen - I die, and my organs are donated (my wish) or my mother may need it one day, in which case I will gladly hand it over.

The point of the blog was not at all about heading out and joining the Jesus Christians - or that they are a model I feel we should copy. Instead, I was commenting on two things:
1. How great it is to "break bread" with people from different faith beliefs and different theological backgrounds. That evening, there were many things we disagreed on, but the one thing we definately agreed on was that the world needs Jesus, and the message Jesus gives - a message of love, forgiveness, grace, and truth.
2. That spiritual warfare is happening everywhere, and that we have our choice - choose faith or choose fear. I'm still going to choose faith. I'm still not going to fear being "spiritually attacked" because I choose to sit with people of other faith backgrounds, or other socio economic backgrounds, or with mental illnesses or the likes - because I believe that I hold the light of Jesus in my heart and that the light will extinguish the darkness. I'm choosing faith. Every day.

So thank you for your concern. Thank you for taking the time to research and send me information. I'm assuming you're a Salvo since you sent it to my office and knew my job title, so I will say - I believe The Salvation Army is the only movement I'm going to ever want to be part of - fear not... I'm not going anywhere! :) I just enjoy meeting people from all over...and as far as I'm concerned, everyone is welcome at my house - regardless of their faith background! :)

Mother Mother...

So yesterday was Mothers Day... a day where you celebrate your Mum. I love that there is a day to celebrate everything that our Mothers do for us. And I'm really lucky, my Mum is a legend. She honestly is. She's one of the most beautiful women I know, and is so much more than my mum, she's my best friend and closest confidante. There's not a thing about me my Mum doesn't know, and she loves me anyway! :)

The only thing I think needs to be adjusted slightly (which is a concept interestingly, that my Mum introduced me to!), is that rather than just celebrating our earthly Mums, why don't we take time to celebrate our Spiritual Mothers. At South Barwon (and interestingly at every other Corps my parents have been in command of!) we celebrate 'Mothering Sunday', and church members are encouraged to not only celebrate their earthly mothers, but to take a moment to thank those women for whom take on an a "spiritual mother" role in our lives. I LOVE THAT CONCEPT.

I have some amazing women in my life, women who have taken the time to truly pour their time, their gifts and their love into my life. I am who I am because of these women. These are the women who will take me for coffee, have a laugh with me, pray for me, and be available for me when I need them. They open their hearts and their homes to me. Two of these women who instantly spring to mind - have never had their own children.

So, why not take a moment to thank the "spiritual" mothers in your life. The women who love you and support you and pray for you and are just "there" when you need them!?

I know I will be.

Something Beautiful

I’m finding it increasingly difficult to find people who truly speak words of truth into your life. I’ve got amazing friends, but sometimes it’s just really hard to not be the “strong” one or the “together” one, sometimes you just have to be broken, and not everyone can handle that, and nor should everyone.

Last night, I was sitting under the very very heavy burden of shame, and guilt, and condemnation, and pain, and the lies and words of death that had been sewn into my heart over the past few years. The thing is, I knew they were all lies, I knew what was going on, well it wasn’t of God basically. I knew that condemnation isn’t something God wants His children to feel, but I just couldn’t shake it. I didn’t have the strength to fight it on my own. I sent out a text message to some of my friends asking for prayer.

My housemate, my beautiful housemate Venita, who was supposed to be in Melbourne, wasn’t. She was home. And whilst I sat there in my brokenness, she spoke words of truth, and life into my heart. For every doubt I had about myself or what I had to offer this world, she had words of truth and love and grace and peace. Every time I said “I know but…” she would say “no, you’re this….”

Even throughout all the stuff going on for her, she sat there in my stuff right by my side. She sat there and was Jesus to me. She sat there and listened to all my junk, warts and all junk, and still loved me, even throughout all of that. We sat there bare, all our insecurities, all our vulnerabilities right there on the table, and you know what… there was no shame in sharing with her. There was only grace and love pouring out from her.

How I crave that sort of relationship. How I seek after it. How I seek to BE that sort of person to people – the person that, no matter what junk you put on the table, I’m right there speaking words of truth, and love and peace and grace. That’s what I’m praying for now…. Even in my brokenness and pain, that I might be the sort of person who is safe to be with, who speaks truth and love and life into your life.

It reminds me of that old chorus:

“Something beautiful, something good, all my confusion, He understood.
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife.
But He made something, beautiful of my life”

May that be true for each of us.

Faith or Fear?

Last night, we got home to find (in true Christian Community style!) that we would be joined for dinner by two guys from the "Jesus Christians" movement, Ross & Israel. What was going to be a rushed evening of a quick dinner followed by small group ended up being such an amazing night of "breaking bread" with fellow believers and a true edification of the spirit.

If you're interested, you should check out who the Jesus Christians are by visiting their website: I don't know a whole lot about who they are or what they do, except that they lead a nomadic life serving God in each community they find themselves in and that Ross (a fellow Melbournian) and Israel (from India)treated us to an evening of Christ-centred discussion, which of course, is what we all need more of! I love that even though we may not agree theologically, we can respect each other enough to stop and learn and share our journey. :)

So anyhow, further to what I wrote yesterday, I was able to speak with these guys about the whole "abuse of authority" pandemic in the church at the moment, and it was good to hear about a genuine community by which each person is accountable to each other. One of the things I didn't write yesterday, which we discussed at length last night - was the "Faith or Fear" mentality in the church, particularly in response to matters of Spiritual Warfare.

From my experience (and please note, I'm trying not to make broad statements here, merely speaking from my experience of church) there has been two different camps within the church - both of which I've been a part of. There is the justice camp - the one where we go out and be lights in the darkness that is trying to oppress people - or there is the heaven/hell fear camp. These are the people who fear the darkness, who blame spiritual warfare on all that is wrong with the world, and as a result hide away from other cultures, religions and "worldliness". Now, if you are in the justice camp - you have no way of denying there is evil in the world, that manifestations take place - you see them on almost a daily basis - the difference between that camp and the other - YOU DON'T FEAR IT! Someone once said to me "if you saw a true manifestation of a demon, you'd understand Sarah"... and you know what, I have... and I do understand... I understand that spiritual warfare is blatantly occurring in today's world. I get that, probably more than you realize. But I also know, that we fight the good fight, and we fight the battle that's already been won. I have FAITH that my God, my Jesus, is bigger than anything that the evil one can throw at me, and as a result I'm not scared of it. I don't fear "demons" or "evil" because I know that when the light comes into the darkness, the darkness flees.

For the life of me, I cannot understand Christians who fear the darkness. Who fear spiritual warfare, or who fear people from other faith traditions/other expressions of life or other cultures. I do not understand that fear that if you hang out with a friend who is into the New Age stuff, demons will attack you - because my God is bigger than that! I can't understand Christians who don't want to enter into conversations with Buddhists or Hindus out of fear that you may be attacked - because my God is bigger than that! If you, as a Christian, TRULY believe that Jesus is the WAY the TRUTH and the LIFE, then why in goodness sake do you fear the darkness?!

So we were chatting about this and someone said "That's because Sarah, the church either preaches faith or fear... I choose faith, others choose fear". And I think that's it, I think I get it now... I choose faith not fear. You see, no matter what "manifestations" happen, no matter how bad the "evil" you are facing is, you have a choice - Faith that the God you serve is bigger than it and that you hold the light, or fear that the darkness will suck you in.

At the moment, I feel like I've had a real kick in the guts, I feel as though my armour is kinked and I'm battle weary - but I hold faith that the very worse that can happen in life is this:
1. Our reputation is left in tatters - in which case, God has a blank slate to start again with.... or
2. We die - in which case we spend the rest of our eternal life with Christ.

So if you are battle-weary like me... if you don't know how much longer you can stand... if you are struggling to stand...kneel with me. Let's be each others armour bearers. Let's take all our broken and kinked armour and share the load and burden together. Because if we have faith that we actually hold the truth, and that the light is within us...the darkness will be extinguished and we may feel like we've lost the battle but we will win the war.

Let's start choosing faith not fear.

Ouch - Sometimes Church Hurts

I’m growing in my concern at the abuse of power within the Church at the moment. I’m frequently and consistently seeing “leaders” exert control over their congregation, telling them how to worship, what to wear, what God is calling the individual to do and worse in some cases. I’d like to say this is happening in all the other churches, and not The Salvation Army, but sadly, there are corps that are just as bad as every other church. So, having experienced some level of control, and abuse of power, and now seeing it for what it is, I thought I’d share some insight into some warning bells I’ve learned to watch out for…

1. Your church leaders have a very clear vision for what the church is involved in, but you have a nagging feeling that they are more concerned with building their own kingdom, not genuinely turning people toward God’s Kingdom. How can you tell? Well if numbers and “stories” (as in something to use to prove what a good church you are) are more important to them than the pastoral care and spiritual development of their flock…there’s a problem. Naturally a healthy church is one that is constantly growing – but if the growth does not extend beyond conversion, and people start to drift away, chances are, you’re church is not healthy.

2. If you leave church on Sunday and you do not feel uplifted and ready to serve God in your every day life, then there is a problem. Naturally a good sermon challenges and convicts you, but if you feel condemned or burdened when you leave, then your church is failing in it’s calling to edify the spirit of the believers and encourage them to go out and serve God. Remember – Jesus calls us to come to Him when we are weak and burdened and He will give us rest. He says “Come to me all you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear and the burden I give you is light” (Matt 11:28-30)

3. When your leaders start dictating to you (a) what you should or should not wear on a day to day basis (b) how you should spend your personal time (c) how much finance or time to you should give to the church and finally (d) who you should and should not be friends with or cutting out family members from your life. This is a really tough one because this is often pretty subtle, and it’s not necessarily easy to measure whether the leaders have overstepped their boundaries and spiritual responsibility. Obviously there are times when we need to be challenged on some of this stuff. If we are deliberately dressing provocatively (and by that I mean, that we purposely choose outfits to entice the opposite sex) to worship, that’s a problem. But that does come down to the motive. Also, we should spend time in fellowship with our church friends, but when that is constantly and consistently at the expense of spending time doing other things we enjoy, that’s a problem. Also, naturally we are called to tithe to “God’s storehouses”…that doesn’t necessarily mean YOUR church. I know many people who tithe over 10% to missions and to ministry projects all around the world… but if your church is insisting on over 10% of your money, you need to question why. Also, no person has the right to tell you who you should allow into your life and who you should not. If you are being told to cut people out of your life because they “don’t get the mission”, and if your church feels that they are more important than the family God gave you…we have problems here.

4. When you are told who to marry or who not to marry – or if you are told to leave your husband/wife by your church pastors – not on the grounds of physical/emotional/sexual abuse, but because he/she is not who the church deem fit for you to marry… I think this is self-explanatory.

5. Your church preaches hate/dislike/prejudice from the pulpit. Jesus came to love the unlovable. Jesus showed grace. Any preacher/pastor/leader who tells you that it’s okay to hate anyone from any other faith/race/sex or anything else, is not preaching the grace of Jesus. It’s really quite as simple as that. Love the sinner hate the sin. Jesus says though “Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged” (Matthew 7:1-2) Let’s face it, there are some things that are really hard not to get judgemental about. I think I’m almost a woman of grace…I say almost because my grace is given freely to my friends and family who do not know Jesus, but I struggle at times to show grace towards judgemental Christians – which is just as bad as what they are doing. In fact, just last night I was talking to somebody quite dear to me about the Westboro Baptist Church (incidentally did anyone watch that documentary last night…man I just couldn’t believe half the stuff I heard!) and how “my grace just does not extend that far”…thankfully, God’s does. Showing grace does not mean you are okay with the sin. It just means that you believe that the convicting, is God’s job. We are merely called to love God and Love others (hey 2Love – what a great name for a youth department, eh Dave?! haha)

6. Naturally – physical abuse of any sort should not be tolerated… if your pastor or leader has physically harmed you – GET OUT!

7. They preach that your church is “better” than others or that “other churches don’t have what we have” or that “God blesses our church more than others”…dangerous dangerous ground. You begin to believe it, you get caught up in the vision, and at the end of the day – it’s just a lie. The Church is the bride of Christ – nobody should diss Christ’s bride…that includes the church down the road, the other denominations, and even other Corps or churches of the same denomination. We are all called to be different, each denomination/church/corps is called to be unique in it’s outworkings of service to God. No two churches should be the same. But just because my church offers this, and that church offers that doesn’t mean either of us is “better” or “more blessed” than the other one.

8. Finally – if you have started to feel that little gut feeling that things in your church or things with your leaders are “just not right” and you start to look elsewhere for another church…and you get challenged about leaving… or if you are called to go elsewhere for whatever reason (ministry/job/marriage etc), and your church do not want to release you… you’ve got big problems. People stepping into their calling, or people finding a place where they are going to better serve and connect with God, is something to celebrate, not control.

There are probably a million other warning signs, these are just the ones I’ve either experienced or have spoken to friends who have experienced…many of our stories, though from different denominations and churches… have had many common elements in the outworkings of the abuse of authority and control put down upon us. All of us have bought into the lie that we either did something to deserve this, or that we were just not Godly enough, or that we had bought about spiritual warfare upon the place, or worse still – that God will punish us for going against the church. We’ve all left feeling as though it was our fault. The flip side of that is that many of us remain in our churches (not me - I got the heck out of there the second someone helped open my eyes to the reality of my situation!) because we “don’t want to jump ship” or “don’t want to lose our friends or community” or “can’t change something from the outside”. And we continue to fall deeper and deeper into a spiral of lies and are stripped further of our worth.
No finally – I need to say that yes the bible does say to respect those for whom have been given spiritual authority…we are to respect our leaders. But that does not mean that we need to stay somewhere we are going to be damaged and abused.

Within the last 2 years, I have met so many of you out there, who just like me have been abused by your church, your pastors or your elders. It strips you of your worth and that my friends is not biblical. The church is supposed to edify and strengthen you – to equip you for ministry in the world. If your church is not doing that, you need to find a church that will before it’s too late and you lose your faith…and that my friends, breaks God’s heart.

Do you really believe....

So I've been thinking a lot lately about some stuff...and been sharing it with a couple of trusted friends.

So here's what I've been thinking.

I've been thinking it's time that Christians stopped using lingo such as "got saved" or "get them saved"...I've been thinking that we're already saved. We've been saved since the day that Jesus died on that cross. We're saved people. The world is saved. What we need to start seeing our job as is not "saving people" but turning them to the cross...introducing them to Jesus. Always Jesus. He did the saving. They're already saved. We just need them to acknowledge that. To really understand that Jesus loves them. That God loved them so very much that He knew the only way to save them from a life of death and destruction was to send His only Son to die so that they may live. We can't save them, we are not the Saviour...the real Saviour the one who actually died for them...did that thousands of years ago. He came to earth and died for THE WORLD, not just for Christians, but for the whole world, then, in the past, in the future and of course now. So we need to shift our thinking a bit on what our purpose in life is... I think our purpose is not to "get them saved" but to turn them to Jesus so HE can show them they've been saved so that they may live both eternally and in the here and now!!

I've been thinking that Christians need to stop being so freaking arrogant all the time. You know what I mean, this goes for me as much as it goes for anyone else... We act as though we're better than everyone else, and it's not the truth. You see, my dear friend Ann spoke at the Forge Gathering, about how at the foot of the cross, we're all equal. And for the first time, I realize that yes, that's what I believe. That even though I acknowledge that Jesus is my Lord and Saviour, it doesn't make me any better than the person next to me who doesn't acknowledge that. It also doesn't make us any better than the homeless person, the drug addict, the prostitute or even the muslim. Because at the foot of the cross, we are all equal. Jesus died for all of us. When we start at that point, the point of sheer undeserved grace - it makes the whole task of evangelism very easy... because you stop judging people for what is wrong in their lives, and start from a point of grace - the point at which Jesus always always started from. Our arrogance doesn't help us, it hinders the cause...that is showing what an amazingly gracious and loving God we serve. Plus, you'll also miss out on the chance of learning something about yourself and your own faith... so many times the people I was trying to "help" or "serve" ended up helping and serving me more than I could ever imagine. I'm no better than anybody else... we are all created in the image of our God, and have all fallen short...at the foot of the cross we're all equal.

Finally, I've been thinking that it's really hard to find people who want to see the best in you...who see you for who you are, and who love that person. Just as you are, not how they want you to be. You see, I have a few people like that - they are more precious to me than any jewel I could ever own. They don't even know it - though I hope that they know that I love them and they're important to me. They probably have no idea that every time we speak, my soul and spirit is edified by them. I met a new friend like that last week. He's been such a blessing to me, and he has no idea. I hope that I can too, be that to some of my friends. That I'm the sort of person who looks at your heart and loves you for who you are. I want to strive to love you for who you are and who you can be...not who you try to be and who I want you to be. I'm seeking heart connections not shifting and changing fair-weather friendships.

So that's where my head is at currently - yes it's confusing and all over the place - I can't help it - as the Collingwood crew would playfully tease - I am a Four after all (check out the eneagram, you'll get it then). It's filled with melancholy and hope. It's filled with lack of belief in self but total belief in a Christ who believes in me... and finally.... It's ever broken but always hopeful.

What Would Ghandi Do?

I've been reading over my notes from the Forge Conference, and in particular thinking a lot about Deb Hirsch's session on The Beatitudes.

One line really struck me, and has been forcing me to look at my own life and actions. She said "Many people argue that the world's most dedicated Christian was a Hindu!" in relation to Ghandi meditating on the life of Jesus, and in particular the Beatitudes.

The world's most dedicated Christian was a Hindu... ouch! But my question is, does that hurt because in actual fact it's true? If a Christian is a Follower of Christ - then Ghandi certianly did that...he followed Christ's teaching to the letter. The only difference between him and a "Christian" is that from my understanding, he did not see Jesus as the Messiah or the Son of God.

Ghandi took the teachings of Jesus, and became one of the world's most talked about peace-makers. He allowed the Beatitudes to really infect his life and made the changes necessary in his own life that literally allowed him to change the world.

So what if Christians did this? What if all of us who claim to be followers of Jesus, actually let ourselves change as a result of the teachings of Jesus. What if we looked at the Beatitudes, and actually allowed it to change the way we lived our lives.

Jesus says in Luke 6:20-22:
Then Jesus turned to His disciples and said "God blesses you who are poor, for the Kingdom of God is yours. God blesses you who are hungry now, for you will be satisfied. God blesses you who weep now, for in due time you will laugh. What blessings await you when people hate and exclude you and mock you and curse you as evil because you follow the Son of Man. When that happens, be happy! Yes leap for joy! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, their ancestors treated the ancient prophets that same way."

This entire passage was counter-cultural at the time. You see back in bible times, you were considered blessed by God if you were well fed, wealthy and respected... sound familiar? Deb argued that Jesus knew that "there is something in the freedom & the simplifying of life that is beautiful and blessed".

That's what Ghandi realized. Ghandi realized that he was blessed when he was poor, and hungry and saddened and mocked. Because he wasn't bound by the chains of society, because he wasn't bound by wanting to be rich, powerful, and liked, he was able to start a movement that changed the world.

I wonder - did the Founders of The Salvation Army realize the same simple truth? Did William & Catherine Booth have that inner wisdom that told them that there is freedom to be found in the poor. That we actually "need the poor to show us our own poverty" as Deb put it. Perhaps they understood this. Perhaps they were driven by the stories of love, grace and forgiveness found when you work with the poor. Perhaps whilst working with the poor they, like so many of us, have found Jesus looking back at us when we're clothing and feeding and loving what society deems as "unworthy" or "unlovable" or "cursed".

I'll leave you with one last quote of Deb's to mill over:

"The Beatitudes challenge us to the core of our being - full of challenge, beauty and danger for the way we live our life." - Deb Hirsch

Pastor or CEO?

This is the question I've been forced to ask myself in the lead up to the Forge Gathering and Salvo Youth Workers Conference. I've been asking myself, because I've been given two books to read: Andy Stanley's "7 Practices of Effective Ministry" and John Maxwell's "21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership". Both of them are supposedly meant to help us become better at what we do - better at ministry - better at strategic planning and the likes. I'd like to say I've finished them both already, but the truth is I'm really struggling to get through them!

My problem is, if I was a CEO, I would gain a lot of knowledge from these books. They have great BUSINESS tools to share with us. But I'm sick to the back teeth of shallow consumer driven, numbers focussed teaching! It's almost like a large chunk of the Christian world is trying to make the Church more like the Business world, instead of making the Business world more like the Church!!!

Dave Collinson blogged (See the Captain Collo blog link), about a session he went to at the Forge Gathering called "The Cult Of Leadership", I highly recommend you checking it out. You see we are trying so hard to become great leaders, that we're neglecting to follow the example of Jesus... and what form of leadership did Jesus impart?

"Jesus knew that the Father had given Him authority over everything and that He ahd come from God and would return to God. So He got up from the table, took of His robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, and poured water into a basin. Then He began to was the disciples feet, drying them with the towel He had around Him." (John 13:2-5)

"After washing their feet, He put on His robe again and sat down and asked, 'Do you not understand what I was doing? You call me Lord and Teacher, and you are right because that's what I am. And since I, your Lord and Teacher have washed your feet, you ought to wash other's feet. I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you. I tell you the truth, slaves are not greater than their master. Nor is the messenger more important than the one who sends the message. Now that you know these things, God will bless you for doing them.'" (John 13:12-17)

So to be a disciple of Jesus, we need to care less about our position in the church, less about the consumer-driven attitude of life, and more about serving others, loving others, and doing to others that which Christ has done for us... that's what makes a Pastor. All the other things? They're simply worldly advice to make us better CEO's...and I don't know about you... But I'd rather be a Pastor!

Forging Relationships

Like what I did there?! Most of you have no idea what the title of this would actually mean - unless we just spent the weekend together - at The Salvation Army Southern Territory's Youth Workers Conference which involved attending the FORGE gathering "Grassroots".

Something struck me over this weekend - the value of forging relationships that strengthen you as a person, a youth worker and as a person in ministry.

I don't think we often think enough about the people that can support us and love us in our ministry positions, and as people. And that struck me massively over the weekend. I promise I'm going to write more about the conference itself in the coming days, I'm just letting the teaching "sit" within my heart and mind and soul at the moment before I comment on what I believe because of it.

But I want to share a unique moment I had with a dear friend and mentor figure in my life. You see, I went to thank her for her teaching that morning, as she was seriously brilliant, and in five minutes, she tore down the things that were holding me back, named them, had me in tears, encouraged me and urged me forward. In five minutes, she was able to do for me that which people have tried for years. She said something along the lines of this:

"Sarah, STOP IT... STOP IT NOW. You constantly let people, generally in positions of perceived power, silence your voice. You have to STOP it! (this was the bit I started to cry in) You have a very strong calling on your life, and a very clear and important message to give. You have a strong conviction, anointing and message of Grace, but you stop yourself from speaking out when you know you should because you think people won't like you. Who cares? STOP IT! Be who you are called to be. Who you are called to be is a powerful woman." She then went on to remind me that next year I'm going to Training College, and people are going to box me in, and try to make me who they want to be, again, people in perceived positions of power, again she said "STOP IT! Give your message, your God appointed message". She told me that many people with similar convictions as mine, are insulted and put down and people try to silence them. They speak anyway. Then she said something that blew my mind, she said "You have no idea how many people pray for you and support you".

She said a bunch of other stuff, that was more pointed, but is not fair to write as it would be too telling of the people involved in the situations, so I'm not going to write it, but what I've been thinking about and trying to work through ever since - is how do you STOP IT? How do you stop letting people in perceived positions of power (whether they be family, friends, workmates, congregation members, teachers, pastors, or whoever) silence you? How do you stop that? I mean, if you fight them, you usually make things worse (well in my particular experience I think it makes it worse) and you certainly create tension. So when you're someone who is a peace-maker, a grace-lover and a justice fighter all at the same time, how do you stop the silencing but still keep the peace.

Which is wehre I guess the "people who pray and support you" come in huh? But how do you find those people?

These are the answers I've come up with so far:
1. You pray that God would give you the strength to speak when you need to and the wisdom to know when to remain silent.
2. Within your spirit you don't give the people who try to silence you permission to speak into your life. You don't change how you relate to them, you don't tell them, but in your heart and mind you say to yourself "I don't give XXXXX permimssion to speak into my life, I don't receive what they're saying"
3. You find people who are wise, loving and full of grace to surround you - if not in location, then certianly in prayer and via facebook/email/phone etc., and you remain in an HONEST relationship with these people - sharing with them your hopes and fears and taking on board their constructive criticism and receiving their prayers.

That's where I've got to so far, hopefully others will have more advice.

What I took from this weekend? That I have some amazing friends, mentors and peer mentors in my life. That The Salvation Army has some of the most phenomenal youth workers, filled with strong conviction and a clear passion and calling to serving God and the youth of this Territory. That these people (men & women) have so much to offer - me, the youth in their Corps (churches), The Salvation Army and most importantly God!

I met some awesome people over the weekend and got to reconnect with some of my oldest and dearest friends. Together, I'm hoping we can figure out the WHERE TO NOW? questions together...

Easter was a happy time!

So I've been doing some thinking about Easter. Most of you know I went away to the Western Victoria Easter Camp. It was honestly, one of the best Easter Camps I've ever been on - and for all you old Melbourne Central crew - it was reminicent of the earlier days at Easter Camp - you know good friends, great fun, awesome speakers, good worship, yummy food and just all-round the best experience you can have!?! It was just like that.

Captains Danielle Strickland & Steven Court were our guest speakers. They took us through some amazing activities that really opened our eyes to a whole other Easter Journey, particularly on Good Friday. Good Friday is traditionally a time where we focus on the pain and suffering Jesus went through in order to save us of our sins. I've always felt like I'm supposed to feel REALLY bad about what a horrible person I am on Good Friday. The problem is, two years ago, that changed for me. Good Friday was the day I went back to church after 5 months away. It was the day I recommitted my life to God. And it was the time I received a lot of healing for stuff that had really damaged me. So I've always wanted to celebrate Good Friday, not feel bad about it!!

So on Good Friday, we carried a cross up a big hill (literally!!) and up on that hill, Steve & Danielle encouraged us to nail the things we hold onto right there on that cross, and walk down the hill leaving it behind. They talked about the point of the cross not being the death and darkness and pain and suffering but the immense love felt for us by our Creator God and our loving Saviour. The point of the cross was not for us to feel bad, but for us to feel thankful that we are LOVED beyond measure. What a gift!! What a thing to celebrate!!! So we celebrated, we had lots of fun, we went on a farm tour (all 30 of us piled into a huge cage, lots of fun!), we laughed, we ate good food (beef - on Good Friday - controversial!!) and we remembered that we were loved, and that Easter is a celebration. Not only that Jesus brought us into a personal relationship with Him, but also because He conquered death!

Easter is a happy time - we should remember that. We shouldn't feel down about ourselves or focus on the suffering - the suffering was a way to show JUST HOW MUCH YOU ARE LOVED...and that you are UN4SAKEN!

Well - I'm off to the Youth Workers Conference & Forge now! Clearly going to have a lot to write next week!

Blessings to all!

In all honesty, are you a Pharisee?

So it's leading up to Easter at the moment (obiously), and Easter is a really important time for me - because it's when I rededicated my life to Christ three years ago. Now granted, I wasn't away from Jesus long... He has this habit of not leaving you alone! But I did blame Him for the spiritual abuse I experienced - which is silly because frankly, it wasn't His fault and grieved Him just as much as it grieved me! But I digress...

I've been thinking about Easter, an in particular Lent. Our Self-Denial appeal has fallen at the same time as Lent this year, and so as a church we've been encouraging people to give the money they save from what they give up to The Salvation Army's work in developing countries. Now I'm a big fan of the Self-Denial appeal - or more likely what it was once called - OWSMS (One Week Salary on Missionary Sunday) - as I believe that for the average-church-goer, it's a good opportunity to force them to think about the third world. I love that.

Personally, I don't actually give One Week's Salary on Missionary Sunday - instead, I give money throughout the year to various devleoping country projects. For me, I find this works - and means that I end up giving more than I would at OWSMS... this will probably change as I marry and have children, but while I am single, it means that I "deny" myself throughout the year, and remain focussed outside of my own little bubble.

I guess my biggest gripe at the moment, is people who give the money for Self Denial, and think that's it. That they've done their good deed for the year, and that is that, they are a good Christian. The rest of the year, they can ignore the needs of the poor and broken, because they've given their weeks salary and so the poor and the broken are looked after. Now as I said - I love the Self-Denial appeal, and honestly believe that it does serve a wonderful purpose in forcing people to look at their privaleged lives. My problem actually lies when these people look at their privaleged lives, make their donations, and then get into their nice cars, drive to their nice homes, and buy their $2000 Prada handbag. Now there is nothing wrong with having nice things. That's not what I'm saying. But do we really NEED $2000 handbags? Do we really NEED $100 shoes? Or diamonds? Or the best stereo or ipod or gameboy or the rest? And do we actually believe that when we have all those things, God is impressed with our one weeks salary on missionary Sunday?

Perhaps rather than looking at comparing ourselves to the Disciples - we should start comparing ourselves to the Pharisees? Ouch right? Harsh huh? But is it a little bit fair? I mean, they genuinely thought they were Holy and Religious people, but Jesus came and tried to turn that thinking upside down. Those disciples - they gave up EVERYTHING to follow Jesus - ALL their worldly goods, their homes, their families, their friends, their jobs. But the Pharisees lived a seemingly religious lives - absolutely giving their 10%. Perhaps giving more. But their lives did not reflect a life of servanthood and sacrifice. I admit - there are times in my life that I am a Pharisee, not a disciple. But I want to change that. I don't want to be a Pharisee. I want my heart to break for that which God's heart breaks. And the reality is, God's heart - it breaks for injustice.

Isaiah 58 is one of my favourite passages in the Bible. I love The Message Translation of it (though the New Living and NIV are also good) where it says:

1-3 "Shout! A full-throated shout! Hold nothing back—a trumpet-blast shout!
Tell my people what's wrong with their lives,
face my family Jacob with their sins!
They're busy, busy, busy at worship,
and love studying all about me.
To all appearances they're a nation of right-living people—
law-abiding, God-honoring.
They ask me, 'What's the right thing to do?'
and love having me on their side.
But they also complain,
'Why do we fast and you don't look our way?
Why do we humble ourselves and you don't even notice?'

3-5"Well, here's why:
"The bottom line on your 'fast days' is profit.
You drive your employees much too hard.
You fast, but at the same time you bicker and fight.
You fast, but you swing a mean fist.
The kind of fasting you do
won't get your prayers off the ground.
Do you think this is the kind of fast day I'm after:
a day to show off humility?
To put on a pious long face
and parade around solemnly in black?
Do you call that fasting,
a fast day that I, God, would like?

6-9"This is the kind of fast day I'm after:
to break the chains of injustice,
get rid of exploitation in the workplace,
free the oppressed,
cancel debts.
What I'm interested in seeing you do is:
sharing your food with the hungry,
inviting the homeless poor into your homes,
putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad,
being available to your own families.
Do this and the lights will turn on,
and your lives will turn around at once.
Your righteousness will pave your way.
The God of glory will secure your passage.
Then when you pray, God will answer.
You'll call out for help and I'll say, 'Here I am.'


I believe that when we, The Salvation Army, get it right again - when we have an Army FILLED TO THE BRIM of Justice fighters, of people who understand the Upside-down Kingdom - then we will see revival, breakthough and churches bursting at the seams. But until we get that right, we'll continue to struggle along - constantly trying the latest fads but not actually seeing all that much eternal growth.

So my question to you - Do you want to be a Disciple or a Pharisee?

A time to fight and a time for peace...

I've been doing a lot of thinking over the past few days, after a great meeting with a lady who's offered to mentor me in the lead up to my going to College. I have three different mentors - one for professional purposes, one who I'm yet to meet with but who will be for personal/spiritual mentoring and now one for my journey to Officership.

Anyway, we were talking about people who are constantly looking for a fight. You know the type - they generally know very little about the subject they want to debate, but with that little bit of knowledge they want to fight everyone who disagrees with them. I guess it's true what they say "A little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing". I was saying that there is someone I know who constantly takes the opposite view to me, and I'm wondering whether it's deliberate now, because whenever the person looks as though they are losing the debate - they claim spiritual warfare is happening. Man that annoys me, more than I think anything else does. I've been lamenting to my father about this, as he's a wise man, and I always like to double check my facts were straight just in case I was wrong and let the "personal" get in the way of the facts - something I have learned over time is a downfall of mine - and when that happens, I need to take my slice of humble pie and apologise. Anyway, upon checking my facts were actually straight on this issue, I continued to lament to Dad about it, and he said "Sarah, you've got to learn that you can't win with some people. They'll just never admit they are wrong."

I discussed with my mentor what she would do in this sort of situation, and her comment was "Well on issues of theology, views and opinions are always different aren't they? So that's the same in life. But when people claim spiritual attack because they know they are losing an argument, you need to call them on that, that is just not biblical, and you need to constantly go back to the bible and ask them what they think the bible says about this topic - and ask them for actual scriptural references."

This is a skill I'm going to have to learn. You see, one of my great strengths is that I stand up for what I believe in, one of my great weaknesses is that I don't back down when people (particularly Christians) make questionable remarks in arguments. There is a time for fighting and a time for peace, but when do you know for sure when is the right time for what?! I guess it comes down to grace. Always grace.

So over the next few months, I'm going to be praying for grace. Grace to know when to speak up and when to remain silent. Grace to allow people to believe what they want to believe and not force my opinions on them. Grace to keep growing with God, and not be happy with just a little knowledge lest I become like those that annoy me with their knowledge! :) Grace grace grace, always grace.

Please keep me accountable to that!! I give you my friends, the permission to do so! :)

Jesus Loves Gay People

I want you to watch the video below. It is a tribute made for Lawrence King, a 15 year old boy who was killed by a classmate for being gay. Please watch this video, it only goes for a minute or so.



If you're unsure of what happened to Lawrence King, he was 15 years old, and gave a Valentines Day card to a boy at his school that he liked. This young boy responded to the card, by beating Lawrence to death.

It is NOT okay to hate gay people. It is NOT okay to allow your children to believe that it's okay to treat gay people with anything but love. It is NOT okay for you to infect your children with your dislike of homosexuals or their lifestyles. Why?! Because they don't have the capacity to differentiate dislike for a lifestyle and dislike for a person. They do not have the capacity to differentiate that when you say you hate gay people, or that gay people deserve to go to hell or whatever other things you are telling your children, it doesn't mean that they should take matters into their own hands.

And if you believe that what happened to this kid was okay...or that your hateful words do not in some way contribute to such hate crimes - let me give you a harsh reality. JESUS LOVES GAY PEOPLE. Let me say that again... Jesus LOVES gay people. And if Jesus loves them...we are also called to love them. If we do not, we are sinning. If we infect this world and our young people with our small minded opinions of what is right and wrong, we risk more and more things like this happening.

Christians NEED to stand up against injustice. Jesus grieves the death of Lawrence King. Jesus grieves that a young boy could be filled with such fear over getting a Valentine from someone of the same sex, that they murder the giver. Guess what people?! As Christians, it is our DUTY to bring love into this world, to be Christ's hands and feet in a damaged and broken world.

Whether you believe gay people are right/wrong/saint/sinner does not change the FACT that JESUS LOVES THEM...

I'm sick of seeing celebrities giving messages that CHRISTIANS should be giving. It's time to stand up people. To love unconditionally. To bring grace and peace into a dark and broken world. To see people as they could be, as Jesus sees them, and then love them unconditionally AS THEY ARE - without judgment or condemnation. If you can't do that, you need to sit down and read your New Testament - and all the teachings of JESUS.

My heart and prayers go out to the families involved in this tragedy, and I pray that you will use it as a wake up call to ACT to bring love and peace in YOUR community.

Proud of our Heritage!

I am currently reading our fearless Territorial Youth Secretary, Captain Dave Collinson, and my friend Nealson Munn's book 'INSANE' - it is essentially a modern day look at the history of The Salvation Army...and it is a brilliant read. I couldn't recommend it more highly!

It is getting me so excited, to look at the rich heritage in which us Salvos come from. I'm not going to go into all the stories, because in reality a lot of us already know them. What I am going to say is this - my resolve to be part of this amazing church and organization for the rest of my life has been strengthened by being reminded of our heritage by this book.

I was talking to a friend of mine last night, and we were chatting about The Salvation Army, and how being part of The Salvation Army is unlike being part of any other church. She grew up in Sunbeams, and has known Salvos throughout her life, but has never actually attended the church. She commented that there is something different about us Salvos, she can't quite put her finger on it though. I tried to explain what I think she was meaning, and without wanting to offend anyone, I'm going to try to explain here also.

Being a Salvo *IS* different to being from any other church. There is something different, a stronger connection perhaps? I don't think you really truly understand it unless you were born into The Salvation Army, or you were converted in the Salvation Army. Maybe you do - but I think there is a difference when The Salvos have been your only spiritual home, or your first spiritual home. Unlike other churches - such as the AOG's, the Baptists, the Anglicans, the Uniting Church, the Catholics, etc., The Salvation Army are truly international. I'm not talking about being in other countries - all those churches are - I'm talking about being truly CONNECTED internationally. In no other church I've been affiliated with (Baptist & Non-denominational Anglican-ish), have I heard them talk about what is happening in Corps overseas, or has anyone cared who the overseas pastor for such and such a church is. Yet in the Army, even today, we read of who has been appointed as Commissioner here, or Chief Secretary there. When you turn up to an Army corps, anywhere in the world, you are home. You are welcomed in. You have something in common. We all share a common mission, common values, common uniforms, common songbooks and common theology. Whilst we express these things in a uniquely community appropriate way, at our core, we are one big happy family.

We have held onto our mission and our calling (mostly, though of course there are some hiccups along the way) for our entire existence, internationally. We remain "One Army Under God". I could not imagine not being intricately linked to people all over the world, or not knowing what is going on in the next church over, let alone the next church after that. Salvos do know what's going on - we share conferences, youth events, camps, and sporting teams. Being a Salvo isn't just about where you attend church, but who you are as a person.

When I left the Army for that period of time (the time I call being a spiritual refugee!) I could not find even remotely that which I felt in the Army. Sure there were successful youth groups and amazing teaching at the churches I could attend - but they were all so... I don't know... Isolated amongst themselves? Individual? I don't know what it was, but the feeling was disconnection with a wider vision.

I love that when I put on my Army uniform (well t-shirt at the moment, uniform to come when I can afford it!! haha!), I cease to be Sarah Eldridge, and stand there as a member of The Salvation Army. I am defined by the Red Shield, the crest, the uniform, and my heritage. I stand there and people know that I am safe. That I am a follower of Jesus. That I will do what I can to serve them as Jesus would. What other church can truly state that for it's individual members?

THIS is why the uniform is important. THIS is why remaining with the structures we have in place, no matter how frustrating they may be, is important. THIS is why the band, and the timbrels, and the sunbeams, and the guards, and the junior soldiers and the senior soldiers is important. Because they connect us with that rich heritage of ours - and it's something we should be proud of not shy away from.

I can't wait to be an Officer within this Army. I can't wait to serve and do my part. I can't wait to stand before the Candidates Board, and tell them about how I want to be a truly international officer, like those of old, who were sent wherever to do whatever the Army needs me to do. I am so excited that God has called me to Officership. I was scared, but I'm not anymore. Because God has called us to be something different, and to do something different, and we need to remember that!

Bring on the future I say, because if the past is anything to go on, we have some amazing stories yet to be written! It's INSANE! :)




PS. You can purchase INSANE from Salvo Supplies, if you want to know where, let me know! It's only $10 and well worth every cent of it!

Joshua or one of the 12 tribes?

Well this is something I quite honestly never really thought would happen. What a journey I've gone on in the past few weeks. Let me begin by saying, that this is a lesson in obedience. It's a tough lesson to learn let me tell you!

On Sunday 10th of Feb, I went to the Welcome to Cadets meeting in Melbourne (well actually in Waverley which seems as far from the City as Torquay is!). I went because one of my friends, Karyn, was entering Training College in order to become a Salvation Army Officer (minister for those who aren't in with the Salvo jargon). I wanted to show her that I support both her and her ministry, and to be honest, any excuse to go to an old fashioned Salvo meeting is good for me!

As we were coming from the other side of Victoria (not quite but it felt that way!), Joel and I made it right as it started - so were directed to the back seats. The sound was atrocious, we couldn't see the screen, and could only hear people when they spoke from one specific microphone. Not my idea of a good opportunity to hear from God! Interestingly enough, we were able to hear the sermon, and as Lt. Colonel Ray Finger (our Chief Secretary) preached, I started to feel that gentle tugging on my heart that this sermon might actually be for me. He was talking about the great need for Officers in The Salvation Army, for people who were called to Officership to be obedient. He talked about how you know you're called, that it's when there is an altar call, and you feel you should go, but don't. That when there is a sermon about officership, you feel nervous, and awkward. That you have never truly been able to find contentment and happiness in any of your jobs. All signs that God is calling you onto something else. I had all of those things right at that moment. It was as though my life was flashing before my eyes, that I realized I've never been happy in any job, and always felt I could do more.

So then the altar call happens "If you are already a candidate for officership, come down. If you know that you are called to be an officer, come down. If God spoke to you in this sermon, come down"... and I knew I should go. Mum turned around and said "If you want to go down there, I'll come with you". No way. Joel looked at me and smiled being a good Divisional Candidates Secretary, I just looked back and said "NO". Then it happened.... Major Marney Turner - the most wonderfully prophetic and spiritual woman I know - comes marching down the aisle - she didn't see me at first, but both she and mum knew she was coming for me - and bang, there she was at my side - literally PHYSICALLY pulling me to come forward. I pulled away and said "Marney I'M NOT CALLED FOR OFFICERSHIP"... so she just prayed for me, right there on the spot.

As I left that service, I knew I was disobedient. That God had called, and despite my promise for the last few years "If God calls me, I'll sign up", I hadn't. I felt ill. Constant butterflies in my stomach. I went home, and took up my devotions book. Great. Numbers 13-14. God tells Moses to send the leaders of 12 Tribes of Israel to Cannan, the promised land. It was LITERALLY the land of milk and honey, the promised land they had been searching for. They all knew it. When they got back to the Israelites, Moses asked them what they found. They told everyone that it was the perfect land. The people were excited ready to go and take the promised land. But 10 of the 12 tribes leaders started to get frightened and told the people there was no way they could beat the big strong people that inhabited the land. The people got scared and decided to rebel against God's promise to them. Joshua & Caleb stood before the people and said:

“The land we traveled through and explored is a wonderful land! And if the Lord is pleased with us, he will bring us safely into that land and give it to us. It is a rich land flowing with milk and honey. Do not rebel against the Lord, and don’t be afraid of the people of the land. They are only helpless prey to us! They have no protection, but the Lord is with us! Don’t be afraid of them!” (Numbers 14:7-9)

The people didn't listen to their pleas, and as a result, wandered through the wilderness for 40 years. Most never saw the Promised Land.

Bang, there it was. I wept openly as I read my devotions. The question my book asked was "At this point in your life, are you like Joshua & Caleb, believing God is with you and leading you to the promised land or are you one of the other 10 tribes of Israel?" I had to honestly say that I had been one of the 10 tribes, not a Joshua or Caleb.

So on Wednesday 13th of Feb, I met with Marney, and signed my College papers. As it happens, I'd prefer to be a Joshua or Caleb, not one of the 10 tribes. I want to walk in the promised land. I don't want to wander through the wilderness for 40 years. I want to not just think God is with me, but to walk within that.

So my question to you is... Are you a Joshua & Caleb, or are you one of the 10 tribes? Are you marching on into your promised land - the place in which God has called you - or are you choosing to stay one of the 10, too gripped by your own fear to march on through?

Because let me tell you, the freedom and release you get when you make a pledge to follow God's way, not yours... man, it's awesome! :)

Saying Goodbye to a True-Blue Aussie

So I've wanted to write this blog for a week now, however, I've been in New Zealand for the Make Change Conference.

As a result, I was away from the internet, and all other forms of media for the news that a true-blue Aussie, and brilliant actor, Heath Ledger had died.

I'm not going to wax poetic about the amazing man and actor that he was. He was only a couple of weeks older than me, and so I was actually the perfect age to watch his career develop. I remember rushing home from school to watch his first Television show "Sweat", and the questions I had when his character on that show was found to be gay. I remember going to see 10 Things I Hate About You at the movies, and laughing with my friends at how far that guy had come since Sweat! Heck, I even watched the TV Show "Roar" (though that had more to do with the Rent cast members that were in it than it was for Heath). Heath was a brilliant actor, there's no doubt about that. The thing I loved most about him though was his "I don't give a hoot" attitude about Hollywood. He was just an Aussie lad who happened to make it big in America. He was a first and foremost a loving father. In fact one of my favourite pictures I've ever seen of him is this one:




purely showing a dad who loves his little girl. Not a movie star who's actively seeking out media attention. But that's not what I want to write about.

As the news travelled by wildfire around the conference, there were many different reactions from "Who's that?" to "Who Cares?" To "How dare he". My initial reaction was one of shock and pure compassion for his daughter Matilda. At 2 years old, she will never get to know who her father is. All she'll have to go on will be what her family and friends remember about him and the movies that he's left behind. I think what bothers me most about this is that one day, she may decide she wants to read more about him, and will google his name - not to find stories about the brilliant actor he was, or the way in which he touched the lives of many around him - but she will find rumours and innuendo about how he died, why he died and so forth.

The fact is, right now we don't know how he died. We can guess it was an overdose, but there is no proof of that at this point, aside from the prescription pills found in his apartment. But the lack of evidence so far has lead to rumours and lies constantly being fed through the media and on the internet. Everyone is looking for that breaking story - following his friends and loved ones around. Trying to get the money shots of Matilda and her mother. It has become a circus. They're not allowing these people to mourn in peace, but are chasing them down. This does not honour the memory of a man who loved his daughter more than anything.

I was talking to some girls at the conference about it, when we had just heard he had overdosed. One of them turned to me and said 'You know what I think is the saddest thing, he has everything that the world says we need, but he still felt empty enough to fill his life with drugs. If he only filled his life with Jesus, he'd still be here today"... I got shivers. At the time I remembered what William Booth said in his famous "I'll Fight" speech:

"While there remains yet one dark soul without the light of God, I'll fight, I'll fight to the very end"

I was challenged so much - how am I fighting for the light of God to be seen in the dark souls in my life? Heath was no more special or no less special than anyone else on this earth - every day there are people dying who do not know that they are loved and treasured by their Creator, and who takes pleasure in them.

But you know the saddest thing, is how some Christians have reacted to the death of Heath. For example the Westboro Baptist Church released this statement:




Two things on this:
1. Heath was not gay. He was an actor. He was a man who played the role of a man who loved another human being. Brokeback Mountain is a beautiful movie. Heath was brilliant in it. Christians have no right to judge Heath on his choice of movies, or confuse life with art.
2. God does not "hate fags". God loves them. He created them. What God hates is when we, those who say we love Him, judge and mock His creation. I know that I am called in my life to love those that the church often neglects to love. I have many many gay friends. I probably have almost as many gay friends as I have straight friends. I believe that what Jesus wants us as Christians to do is love people as He loves them. It is not our place to judge people. Who are we to be so special? So to the people at Westboro I say this - read your New Testament, and how Jesus loved people. Stop using one or two verses out of context to judge and mock one of God's beloved children. It is not making God proud of you with your convictions, it's making God angry. You are not helping Christianity, you are hindering it. So just stop.

And to you, my friends, I set you a challenge:
1. Pray for Matilda Ledger & Heath's family
2. Think very carefully before you buy into the lies and innuendo
3. Pray that God help you show the light of God to a dark soul or two this week.

So in closing I say this - I pray that Heath Ledger rests in peace. I pray that his family are left to mourn in peace. And I pray that Matilda will grow up to know not the trash that's on the internet, but that her daddy was a brilliant actor and that he loved her much.

The Cross marks the spot!

What an awesome weekend I've had. We've raised money to get two of our young guys to NZ, I've spent time with some of my most precious friends here in Geelong, and Torquay Live was AMAZING last night!

I try not to bore people with the details of my life on this blog (isn't that what Facebook is for?!?!) so I'm going to skip right on to church - Torquay Live and why it was so amazing.

As I've written over the past few weeks, we're doing a kind of "unplugged" approach to Live over the month of January - mostly because so many of our church family are away at the moment. So our band has gone acoustic, we're sitting around tables, and we're watching a DVD and then sitting around and discussing it.

Last night, we watched Loui Giglio's "How Great Is Our God" - the follow up to "Indescribable". Now I thought Indescribable blew my mind, but it had NOTHING on How Great is our God! I can't recommend sitting down and watching these DVD's enough. I will give you a warning though - they're hard to get into. He's very scientific in the lead up to the blow-your-mind point...but bare with him, because it's worth it.

The thing that has blown me away through this though is two single photos.

The first is this:

What is it you ask?! It's a photo taken by the Hubble Telescope - it's the centre of the black hole in the core of the Whirlpool Galaxy - over 31 million light years away. It's one of the largest and most distant Galaxies we can find. At it's core is a black hole, and at the core of that black hole Hubble took a photo of what NASA named "X". I don't know about you but I'm pretty sure I'd call that a cross, not an X!

The second is this:

Now I probably only know of one or two people who would know what this was at a look - Liz at my church and Matt in the UK - my two scientist friends. For those of you like me, who are looking at it and saying "Okay, so I get that it's shaped like a cross, so I get the point of including it but what is it?!" It's Laminin. The most basic description of Laminin (which I needed!!!) is that it is the glue that holds our body together. It's the molecule that holds together our skin, our organs, our muscles - and without it, we would literally fall apart. Our body is made up of millions of these Laminin molecules - which means that essentially, our body is LITERALLY hold together by the cross.

Phill left us with a thought - "One of the biggest things in the universe we've been able to find and photograph points us to the cross. And...one of the smallest things we've been able to find and photograph points us to the cross." Wow!

I am at a loss as to how you can see such beautiful pictures, and not believe that you were created by a loving God. Last night, the Psalm (139:14) that says "For I know that I am Fearfully and Wonderfully Made" took on a whole new meaning.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made - and at the very core of the universe and at the very core of you - Jesus placed a cross to remind you how very loved you are!

The bigger things in life

So over the past few weeks, I've had time to start to look at the bigger issues in life - not the little petty things we worry about but the things that affect who we are and who we are becoming.

One of those for me, is who I allow to speak into my life. As someone who takes what people say to heart, I need to be careful at who I allow to speak into my life. The problem with this is that I'm not very wise at it. I often carry comments people say to me deep within me for many years, when they could have (a) been a throw away line or (b) not even been about me - but directed at me because of where the person giving the comment was at spiritually or emotionally. This is something I continue to work on, but it's something that's kind of been coming to a head for me for a little while now. You see, I have a few people in my life who I really disagree with - theologically and emotionally they are my polar opposite. I love these people, and they are dear friends of mine. But I should not be allowing them to speak into my life. Meaning, I shouldn't be taking what they say on board. They are good Christian people, and I'm sure that what they are saying they think is the right thing - but the Jesus they profess to know, and the idea of church they believe in is just not my experience of Jesus and chruch. And yet sometimes after having a conversation (or debate - because we all know that I can hold my own when it comes to hearing things I disagree with!) I leave feeling condemned and inadequate. I'm sure that was not at all their intention - as I said these are dear friends of mine who have known me for a long time - but I carry their throw away comments and the condemnation and inadequacy for a long time afterwards. Perhaps they feel the same way - who knows?! But what I'm saying, is that I need to learn to be more careful at who's advice and guidance I am really willing to listen to.

The reason I've been thinking about this lately is that I've been trying to find a mentor figure I can see on a regular basis. I've always been surrounded by some of the most amazing people and brilliant pastors/officers/social workers/theologians/youth workers - right from an early age, I can remember discussions of theology, and youth work practice taking place around me. This is because of who my parents are, and the kind of ministry they have had - which in turn has meant that their friends have been great youth work practitioners, Officers, Pastors and social workers. As I got older and moved into the field myself, I was still always surrounded by these people, who took an active interest in my career - if for no other reason than they'd know me my whole life, and they wanted to "check in on me". Even as I gained more experience, for some reason I've always been able to surround myself with older and wiser mentor figures who I would see often due to the various meetings I'd have to attend, and who I would grab a coffee or a meal with afterwards to work through some of the deeper questions I had. These were people who saw me on a regular basis, took an active interest in me, and wanted to impart their passion, their wisdom and their experience onto the next generation. I've never "formalized" that mentoring relationship because I never had to. I knew I would see them either once a month, or every week in some cases.

Since moving to the Surf Coast now, I haven't had that. I'm not around the experienced practitioners, and they're not seeing or hearing about the work I'm doing. This has made my time with my Dad so much richer - because a lot of the things I'd normally wait and ask one of his friends rather than allowing him to impart his knowledge and wisdom - I'm needing to rely on him for. And as his daughter, I know he'll share more with me about things than he would someone he is mentoring - I also know he expects more of me than someone he is mentoring... a pressure I don't have with others. So there is a need for me to find a mentor. But when you are someone like me - who takes what people say to heart and not at face value - there is a need to find a pretty special person to do that, and how do you go about doing that?

For instance the ideal mentor for me is:
* Someone with a richer experience than me in Youth/Social/Welfare/Ministry Work (that's a given - and it could be in one or all of the above)
* Someone with a wider view of theology and spirituality than me (also a given)
* Someone who's not afraid to speak their mind
* Someone who values me when I speak mine - even if it differs from their opinion
* Someone who's willing to challenge me on areas I need to look at - but who does so in a loving way - not out of spite or negativity, but out of a genuine desire to see me become a better person.
* Someone who understands that as a mentor their responsibility is not to tell me what they think - but to share with me their journey - and get me to widen my thoughts and opinions
* Finally - someone who believes in me more than I believe in myself, who wants to see me develop into the best youth worker and person I can be, and who delights in my successes and helps me work through my failures without judgement or a sense of competition.

On top of that, they need to be someone I'm going to see, or who has time to invest regularly, not just once every now and then. But I'm finding that is exceedingly difficult to find someone as people are so busy nowadays!

At the end of the day, I think we all need that don't we? We all need someone we can go to, to bounce ideas off, to sit at their feet and grow and develop as people. And then in turn hopefully we can become the sort of people those younger than us can seek out to mentor. Perhaps you have already found someone, and that's great! Perhaps you're already mentoring, and that's really awesome!

So if any of you have any suggestions of who I might be able to approach, please let me know. If you don't, would you join me in praying that I can find that person? And I will pray that you too will find someone!