Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Father Abraham....

So... there's some big news, many of you would have heard by now, but I felt I should blog about so as to dispel any rumours that may arise.

Last Monday, I resigned from my position as the Youth & Children's worker at The Salvation Army Torquay. I did not do this in anger or hurt, but because I really felt that God was calling me on from there. This is a hard concept for many people to understand, but it was something I felt I had to do.

This is how it came about.

In Febuary, I felt called by God to be a Salvation Army Officer. More than that, I felt that I needed to go in 2009. For those who don't know, there is a long process you need to go through before you can go to Training College, there are assignments, forms, fundraising and about a million other little things that need to be done in your preparation. If I was planning to go to College in later years, I could have done all of these things at Torquay, however, as a church plant, who have limited team members, and a constant flow of events, programs and the likes, to get all this done, and be the person solely responsible for the development of Youth & Children's programs, I just couldn't do it in 10 months.

Also, things have been growing so rapidly over the past few months, new ministries and programs need to be established, but I don't feel it's fair to start new things, when someone else is going to be coming into my job in 6 months. So I started to feel as though, perhaps, now is a good time for someone to come in and take the ministry to the next level. That I've planted the foundations, but it was time to hand over and allow someone else to cultivate and harvest.

About 3 weeks before the Candidates weekend, I was feeling the pressure of trying to get things done, and how it was all going to happen. I spoke to a few of my mentors about it, and we were praying through options.

I went into Candidates Weekend unsure of what to do, or what God was requiring me to do. I still felt unsure right up until the Sunday morning when the Commissioner spoke and told this amazing story about the lessons a man learned from trying out the trapeze. It's kinda a long story but the shortened version is that he learned three lessons:
1. In order to get there (to the other side), you need to leave here (where you are standing).
2. You need to decide let go of your safety and security in order to get there. (changing from one swing to the other)
3. You don't have a lot of time to make the decision.

As he spoke, I just knew, God was saying "Sarah do you really trust me?" and of course you say "yes Lord", but that pesky God of ours asked again, and I had to admit that I don't trust God with every part of my life, only the small things. A friend confirmed that by asking whether I'd listened to what had just been said. Then I spoke to someone who's mentoring me a bit at the moment and she said "Yes I've felt that for a little while", and then finally, a good mate said to me "Sarah I feel as though God's asking me to remind you of Abraham and Isaac".

I knew what that meant. God asked Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac to prove that he trusted God with every aspect of his life (in case you don't know the story - God comes through right at the last hour to stop the sacrifice!). I believe God is asking the same thing of me - sacrifice my comfort and security of a job, in order to show that I believe God when He says He will provide all my needs. It's a lesson I need to learn - that God will indeed take care of me if I hand my entire life over to Him.

So as painful as it was to tell the kids on Sunday, and as hard as it will be to say goodbye to the great friends I've made in Torquay, I need to do this, because it's what God is asking me to do.

God's already provided some interesting job options to explore. I don't know where they will lead right now, but they're there, and I'm trusting God's got the next step in store already!

So that's my story - I'm going to be an Abraham, and make a sacrifice for Him.

But I carry with me the love and good times I've had during my time at Torquay Salvos! I know I'll be a better officer because of it.

5 comments:

Darren Lamotte said...

Hi Sarah great credit for your courage, it is never easy to leave something you love and enjoy to follow God's call into the future. You continue to amaze us and we know that God has great things planned for your ministry. Hopefully we may be able to share some of this with you.
Be assured of our prayers,love and support.
We must catch up soon. The Lamotte Family

Anonymous said...

You "felt called by God to be a Salvation Army Officer".

Do you have anything more definite than a feeling?

I'd want something like that in writing.

Let's pray:

Dear God,
Just what is your problem - you supplied written instructions thousands of years ago, why not at least give this poor woman clear written expression of your present will regarding her life. And if you do, try to make it coherent and relevant this time. Amen.

Sarah Eldridge said...

Sorry about the delay in both publishing these comments and in replying - it's been a manic two weeks.

Darren - you and your family have been great supporters of both me and the ministry I have been involved in. Your friendship has been a constant source of strength and inspiration to me. Thank you! (PS - GREAT seeing you guys this weekend!!)

David - I pray for you often. You have clearly been very very hurt by someone (or some people) within The Salvation Army. As someone who was also hurt deeply by someone in the Army, I understand to a point where your anger comes from. I only hope, that like me, you will eventually come to a place of peace, forgiveness and restoration. There is great freedom in that.

Blessings,
Sarah

Anonymous said...

Sarah, the point was that making decisions based on a "feeling that God is calling you" looks, on the face of it, irresponsible.

Think about the consequences if people started resigning from their responsibilities, simply based on a personal feeling.

It also makes a blasphemous mockery of God. For you are suggesting that God is not powerful enough to communicate with people clearly, instead He needs to resort to manipulating people's emotional state in some vague way.

Sarah Eldridge said...

David,
I don't know you, please do not presume to know me.

At no point do I actually say that people should resign from their responsibilities based on "emotion". Obviously in a blog I'm not going to go through absolutely everything that went on in relation to the lead up to my decision and in my own personal prayer life and spiritual journey.

And in fact, the thing that took me most by surprise was that the feeling was not clouded by emotions at the time - it wasn't a big altar call with music and all the usual trappings. It was actually something that happened deep within my spirit, and was confirmed by people who knew very little about the situation at all.

Contrary to your statement, I believe God is incredibly clear if you can discern His voice - you however have openly stated on other blogs that you do not hear from God. God communicates with people clearly if they are willing to hear from Him.

It's fine if you disagree with me. I'm confident enough in my own beliefs to not be shaken by others disbelief. Just don't presume to know me. You do not.